A mess in the head...

Sometimes life juz seems to b out of ur grasp wen ur trying hard to grab it... Sometimes it juz comes too fast u dun even have d chance to get a hold of it... But... In truth, wat are d things dat u really wanna grab hold n wat are d things dat u wanna juz let it go???

There could be 1001 answers to this... Some might say I dun wanna let go of d little time I hv now n wanna let go of my over-loaded responsibilities n commitments... Some might say I wanna hold on tight to d one I love n juz let go of everything in my life... But wat exactly dat ppl wan in life??? Sometimes they juz contradict themselves so much dat they even got confused of wat they wan and blinded by emotion...

D same thing happend to me before... I was so blinded by emotion dat I went for d extreme for wat I crave for so much... To be wif d one I love... I guess everybody in dis world could understand d feeling of wanting to be wif d one u loved so much... Be it ur parents or ur lover... But sometimes u are juz so blinded by dat love of yours n juz forsake n forgot about other things around u n whoever it is...

Now I've realised one thing... Sometimes, we juz can't do things according to our emotion... We must always think n analyze d situation before making a decision... Wat's d pros n cons n wat is d result of watever decision made in d long run... Would it make u happy for d rest of ur life or it's oni a momentary one??? There are a whole lot of aspects to be taken into account for...

Ppl would always thought dat I am weak juz b'cuz of d way I show but they juz dun seem to fullly understand me n juz misjudged me... Some would think dat I would juz kill myself either by sliting my wrist or jumping off d roof... When I'm holdin a knife, it's not dat I wanna slit my wrist or somethin... It's juz a tool for cutting, fruits, papers etc... When I say dat I wanna go to d roof top it doesn't mean dat I wanna jump... I'm juz trying to see how wonderful d world is n I've learn a thing bout high places once accidently actually... All cuz of trying to save a life... Haha... It's dat whenever things gets all messed up n confusing, it seems to be clearer wen ur up in high places... Dat's y now, I'm starting to like high places although I may hv altophobia(afraid of heights)...

Sometimes it takes more than juz analyzing someone from how d way they act n talk... It's more to understanding... But, wat is it meant to understand a person??? I may not know d answer... As I am no philosopher or researcher nor even a psychologist... I am juz a plain old kid who's in college n trying to find things out about life n how it works...

I used to be blinded by all the emotions n questions in my head... It used to be clouded n hazy until I cannot think straight... But.. After sitting down n juz close my eyes n juz concentrate my mind... Everything juz cleared up n I could think straight again... But it's not all done alone... Friends too play a big role... Thanks to my friend dat gives me support n advice... Haha...

But wat I'm trying to say here is... Wat exactly we human or some scientific freaks will say homo sapiens actually wants??? Wat is it dat makes us human human??